There are situations where the golden handcuffs are on. We are in jobs we don't love, maybe even dealing with people we don't like and yet, if we don't do it, we sink.
What do we do?
1. Create options
There is nothing worse than being in a bad place without a fall back option or two. This means, in confidence, applying for other jobs, saving some cash or thinking about starting your own business. If you do the latter, please do a detailed business plan or you are likely to fail.
2. Don't Blame
The most important element to avoid that can totlaly disempower you and make the whole thing worse is to blame the company, the boss or your job. You can, with skill, adapt to any job, role or position and find some peace of mind in it if you don't blame the work, In the book "Innerwealth, Putting The Heart and Soul Back into Business" there are untold exercises that can assist you in dealing with situations without blaming. That's the key here.
3. FInd your Vision..
No matter how bad things get, if you have a vision, inspiration and purpose that inspires you, then you can always link what you are doing to that vision and then it becomes inspiring. As an example. A client was in golden handcuffs in a job with an abusive and negative boss. They developed their VIP statement and linked the seven areas of their vision to what this job and the skills of dealing with the abusive boss was teaching them. In the end, they found it acceptable if not enjoyable to use the opportunity to learn.
It is wise to use skills we share in our Nature's Law off-sites to use every resource at your disposal to create a better environment for your work. This is an extensive and simple way to change your mindset even when the circumstances are not pleasant. There is a significant amount of writing on this web site to support this idea that environment can transform mindset fast.
Tilly Smith was ten years old.
Tilly, her little sister Holly, and her mum and dad, were all on holiday.
They’d gone to a sunny place called Maikhao Beach.
They got up early and walked along the beach in the sun.
As they were walking, Tilly noticed the tide had gone out.
A very, very long way out.
She also noticed that the water was frothy, just like a pint of beer.
She stopped dead.
This was exactly like the newsreel film her geography teacher had shown her back at school in Surrey.
Mr Kearney had shown her class some old black and white footage of Hawaii in 1946.
It was the only film anyone had ever seen of a tsunami.
In fact most people hadn’t even heard the word tsunami.
But Tilly was convinced that was happening right now.
She tried to explain to her mum what she thought was happening.
Her mum wasn’t convinced, obviously.
No one had heard of a tsunami.
No one on the beach, including the life guards, was taking any notice.
So this probably happened all the time.
How could a ten year old girl from Surrey know more than the people who lived and worked here?
Tilly started to yell at her dad.
She was positive this was the thing Mr Kearney had shown them two weeks before.
Her dad had a difficult choice.
Listen to his ten year old daughter, who was getting hysterical.
And maybe cause panic on the beach.
Or ignore it and just take his daughter back to the hotel until she calmed down.
But what if she was right?
All these families, all these children, would die and he’d be responsible.
For an Englishman, embarrassment is the worst thing of all.
But he decided he had to take a chance.
He told the security guards, who told the lifeguards.
The beach was cleared and everyone went back to the hotel and climbed to the third floor.
They didn’t have to wait long.
In less than a minute the first of three giant waves struck.
In fact giant waves struck beaches all over South East Asia that morning.
It was the Boxing Day, 2004.
In a few hours everyone in the world knew what a tsunami was.
Because that tsunami killed a quarter of a million people on beaches in thirteen different countries.
But there was one beach where no one died.
The beach Tilly Smith had been on.
That was the beach everyone left before the wave struck.
Because ten year old Tilly refused to shut up.
She wasn’t old enough to be silenced by crushing embarrassment.
She was still young enough to know she was right, and not allow herself to be quietened down.
Later, she was taken to the United Nations, where she was publicly congratulated by Bill Clinton.
Because Tilly saved the lives of over a hundred people.
Men women and children.
By being unreasonable.
By insisting on being heard.
Instead of wishing she’d spoken up after it was too late.
That’s something we could all do with learning.
Regret is worse than embarrassment.
Article From Daily OMRaising Our Consciousness
Stepping out from Where We Were
by Madisyn Taylor
We cannot gain a sense of power in our lives while identifying ourselves as a victim.
Albert Einstein said, “No problem can be solved from the same consciousness that created it. We must learn to see the world anew.” A Nobel Prize winner, Albert Einstein’s scientific theories transformed the world’s understanding of the universe and its workings, so we can believe that these words come from his personal experience and helped him to explore both science and life itself. He offered us an example of what can be learned by looking deeply into nature to reach a deeper understanding of all life and by following our ideas to their logical conclusions in our minds before acting upon them in the world.
When we apply this quote to our lives, we can see that we cannot create abundance by staying in a consciousness of poverty, nor can we gain a sense of power in our lives while identifying ourselves as a victim. Situations begun from anger or fear can have little chance of reaching a state of peace and trust unless someone involved can conceive of that possibility and act upon it. We need to find ways to step outside of our limited understanding in order to seek a bigger picture. One way to do this is to shift our perspective to see the situation from another’s point of view and ideally the perspective of all others involved. Even if we can’t truly know another’s motivations, by imagining what they might be, we open ourselves up to numerous possibilities and an expanded vision. This alone can shift our feelings of anger to compassion and the desire for a positive solution for all involved.
Once we have opened our mind to greater possibilities, we can connect to our higher self for inspired solutions. From the peace at our center, we gain distance from our emotions to connect to intuitive wisdom that offers us understanding of the underlying causes and the inspiration needed to guide our steps in a new direction. Albert Einstein showed us the impact that can be made when we raise our consciousness and allow ourselves to imagine the possibilities.
- Mindful of Body
- Mindful of Feelings
- Mindful of Mind
- Mindful of objects
Imagine you are sitting at your desk, a meeting is about to start and it is very, very important but your mind just wont function clearly. Everything seems jumbled, you are not fully prepared, you decide to wing it.
How could you have done this different and why was your mind fuzzy? How could you get in control of your performance?
How much stress do you think this situation places on people?
How could you change this situation just by simple body mind techniques?
How could you change this situation just by simple mind control techniques?
What does this circumstance have to do with yesterday? Part A Becoming Aware of Body.
Where does the mind start and the body finish? Stamina and health is more than looking good or being able to run a few kilometres. Stamina means you can handle stressful situations.
A person who is carrying allot of emotion, or who has physical fitness but not health, will wilt under even the smallest stressful pressure. So, the ability to stand up and move from motivation to inspiration requires a mindful approach to body, feelings, mind and objects.
It is a known fact that the body stores emotion, and in some cases, that emotion causes disease. But there's much much more. A healthy body is not essentially the most good looking body. A healthy body has resilience, immunity and the ability to cope with a diversity of environments. When a body evolves is grows more capable of experiencing stress, not less.
Stress can take the form of emotional, mental, physical and spacial challenges. If we are to run a business, invest in stock markets or property markets, exist in an exiting relationship, travel the world, we need stamina and health. Not good looking health, but real, strong, resilient health.
Lost sleep, travel, crappy food and allot of hard thinking are a part of any person's life, whether it be children, business, investments, or sport. So, evolving your mind, body, feelings stamina is a critical part of a full and exciting life.
For a clear mind your body must be in your awareness. You will need to know the affects of food, posture, breathing, exercise and environment on your body and therefore your mind.
The step of becoming in control of the way your body is positioned, what goes into it, how it serves you in your life is a very beautiful one. It took me thirty years of yoga to discover the answers, but it doesn’t need to take that long. In my seminars we spend only a few hours and from that, the whole body mind science can be completely understood, and then, the difficult challenge, the key is to apply that knowledge: putting it to practical use.
The skills I use for this step are:
- Burst Training for Stamina
- Corpse Pose for Nerve Control
- Posture correction
- Perfect Stillness - Inner listening
- Constitutional Analysis
- Diet and Nutrition Consultation
- Meditation practices
These are all included in the 30 Day Back on Track Consulting ProgramPart B Becoming aware of Mind and Emotion
Emotion is a great aspect of life but emotion is a disturbed state of mind. No good decisions and very little clear thinking takes place in a state of positive or negative emotion. Emotion might be great for watching a movie, dating, and playing with life but when clear thinking and good vision are required emotion is a poor foundation.
People will not place their trust in a person who cannot control their emotion and they will not put their trust in a person who has no emotion. The point here is to know how to have emotional authenticity and yet, never act from that place. This is called mind control.
Mind control will rid you of emotional downers such as depression and mental stress. I recommend the process of natural law because it’s easy, fast and absolutely natural.
The skills I use for this step are:
• Centering Techniques
• Mindful awareness
• Mind Balance
These skills are taught later in the Back On Track 30 Day ChallengePart C Becoming Aware of the Feelings
Other people feel your thoughts before you speak them. Much of this awareness for people has been lost. Many people still say one thing and feel another but think no one can detect the difference. There is also a huge group of leaders with blocked feelings. They have buried those feelings for so long, they have lost touch.
This is a very important step in being an authentic leader and gaining support on your career path. When people detect, even subconsciously, that there is a lack of integrity between feelings, body language and words, they withdraw, and this is a disaster for a good leader.
In the program you can focus on this aspect in order to develop more personal authenticity.
The skills I use for this step are:
• Interconnectedness with nature
• Personal Magnetism
• Breathing TechniquesPart D Becoming Aware of Objects
Objects have energy. Even a broom handle has energy. It’s all about us and some people can feel this energy, some can’t, but everyone is affected by it.
A room will carry the energy of the last occupants. A chair will have the energy of the last person seated in it. An office will have an energy based on the history and hopes of those who work in it. Trophies, photographs, art, pieces of paper, book spines: these all impact the mind, body and feelings in an office.
We do not pay enough attention to our environment handing it over to architects, interior decorators or even the office junior to manage. I believe an organization can increase productivity by 20 -30% just by environmental management within the offices. And, I believe that harmony in the office increases, health problems decrease and stress drops when environmental considerations are give as high a priority in leadership as human psychology.
The skills I use for this step are:
• Intuitive Awakening
• Inner Calm - Stillness - Inner Listening
There are great masters such as Emerson, Plato and many Asian Masters (Lao Tzu) who are convinced that if mankind lived life according to the principles of Nature, then we would be at peace with ourselves and with each other. It’s a philosophy not uncommon in the ways of the East but has yet to be fully grasped by the western world. We are hoping this modern way of presenting this ancient theme will resonate with you, irrespective of your cultural or religious background.
Part of BLOG POST COPIED FROM PAID TO EXIST WEB SITE
Work is sacred.
Work is giving yourself. It’s creative self-expression. It’s opening your heart and providing value to others. It’s exchanging a part of yourself with someone else. It’s a possibility for you to make a difference in the world.
Seeing work as just something to do to get by is like slapping yourself in the face.
Here’s why I just can’t slap myself anymore:
I don’t want to spend one third of my life living out of a sense of drudgery.
I don’t want to rent out my body and mind for five of seven days of the week.
I don’t want to spend every day counting down the minutes to lunch, then counting again to five o’clock.
But much, much, much more than that, I don’t want to confine myself to choosing work that isn’t meaningful and doesn’t matter to me.
And that’s really the biggest problem with seeing work as menial labor. By defining work as such, you incarcerate yourself in a narrow field of possibilities of what work could be. Yes, work can be tedious. Doing your taxes, filing receipts, stapling, responding to email, and doing repetitive tasks can be pretty damn boring. There’s no way to trick yourself into believing otherwise. (Non-resistance to the tedium, however, can make it a lot less painful.) But despite the tedium, work can be much more than that. The work you do can be the gift of what you leave behind on this earth when you’re gone. It can be the difference you make in other peoples lives.
When you expand your definition of what work is to a mutually beneficial exchange of value, it becomes more of a blessing and an opportunity.
This is the way I’ve started to think about work; I ask myself, “With the work you do today, how can you create the biggest positive impact in other people’s lives, while fulfilling your own dreams at the same time?”
And if I have work to do that is truly boring (like figuring out how much taxes I owe) I ask myself, “I know this work isn’t what I’d absolutely love to do, but since it must be done, by not resisting it, can I make it less painful?”
I also have to be careful to distinguish between work that must be done (like taxes) and things that seem required, but really aren’t. For example, it might be a good idea for me to spend some time every day networking, but if it doesn’t feel authentic, it would be a waste of time. If I really felt like creating, rather than connecting, I should honor that feeling. When I express myself authentically, I naturally have a greater impact then when I force myself to do something because I think it would be a good idea.
When you start to see work as play, as giving yourself to the world, as being an agent of change, you completely shatter the perception of work as a burden.
Because that’s where all this seeking to escape from work comes from (which is really what the 4HWW is about). Whether it be counting down the days to your yearly two week vacation, setting up a four hour workweek or creating passive income; whether it be the desire to retire early, win the lottery or strike it rich, it’s all in the effort to escape from the obligation of spending your life in a state of endless resistance to doing chores. It’s like we’re six years old again, fighting with mom about cleaning up all the stuff we’ve crammed under our bed. Not much has changed, huh?
But when work becomes something reverent to you, you no longer to seek escape from it. Besides, imagine if you really did find that elusive escape. Would it really solve all your problems? Sure, you’d have a lot of free time, but is that really what you’re looking for? Just free time?
I think it’s something more than that. I think it’s the lack of purpose, the lack of depth in our work that leads us to chase ideas like a four hour workweek and autopilot income.
No amount of freedom of time will quench your desire to make a difference, to live with purpose.
As Rolf Potts represents in his awesome book, Vagabonding, you can only live so long sipping martinis on a beach. Sooner or later, you’ll be bored. You’ll want to actually do something that matters.
Despite all the head-drilling society does to make you think work equates slavery, there are many possibilities for work to be a joy.
One of those options is The Zero Hour Workweek — a guide to getting paid to be who you are.
(Note: I did learn a lot from The Four Hour Workweek. I think Tim has some great ideas, like mini retirements, following a low information diet, etc. I also think he did an awesome job pointing out the stupidity of “work for work’s sake.” However, I do think the central idea of the achievement of a four hour workweek solving all of your problems is misleading. Tim defines work as something you really despise, and I just think that’s confusing things more, rather than bringing clarity to the situation. I guess it’s all about semantics, though, right? As Clinton said during the Monica Lewinski case, “Please define sexual relations.”)
There are competing forces for your time: health, wealth, love, friends, learning and growing.
While at first glance it may appear that these competing forces are disparate - going in different directions, that assumption cannot remain true if you choose to live your purpose in life and be paid well for it.
Imagine five elephants tied to a post (I know it's not a good animal rights picture but bare with me please) - now imagine them pulling in opposite directions. The post won't move because there is a counterbalance of the force of each elephant. The individual will say that their life is rich and in balance, but really their life is rich and rewarding in counter balance.
That counterbalanced person will say that their sport counterbalanced their stress and their friends counterbalance their work and their relationship love counterbalances their wealth, or something like that.
But to live on purpose one needs to forget balance and become aligned. Aligning friends, love, work, wealth and health with one single point of focus, their purpose.
You see, when the going gets tough in life, counterbalance makes it safe, but when the going gets tough on purpose in life, we need all of our life elements pulling and pushing us harder in the direction we chose, not making us comfortable.
Seeking counterbalance means comfort and safety, but seeking purpose is not comfortable nor safe. Seeking purpose there is no 50% - no half hearted stories, no regret.
In counterbalance there is nothing but regret because what is good for health is bad for love and what is good for wealth is bad for friends and what is good for love is bad for health. You can't win no matter what you do, the forces of life counterbalance and contradict each other.
On purpose, and being paid extremely well for it you simply know your purpose and love for it, health for it, wealth for it, friends for it. It's way out of balance because you have a great vision, dream, life outcome. You want to make a difference and you know that while you counterbalance each element counteracts the energy of the other.
If all the elements pull in one direction you don't need safety - there's a certain aura of confidence that the little glitches in life will be superseded with big victories. You might be struggling with money but your love will pull you through or you might be struggling with health but your wealth will pull you through or you might be struggling with love but your friends will pull you through.
The big difference is to see the difference between rescue and purpose: in counterbalance with the elephants pulling on the centre pole (you and your sense of self) there is an obsession with feeling good, so the counterbalance model feels superb. If you don't feel good in health, then you improve your health. But in the purpose model, if you don't feel good in health you know that nothing is missing, health is just in another form, because all the elephants are pulling in the same direction.
The difference between being on purpose and being paid extremely well for it and being in counterbalance mode is not really measured clearly in the outcome of your life, it is however measured in the quality of your life. One process thrives on experiences and events, the other on a deep deep sense that your life has a meaning greater than the next happy thing.
Living purpose and being paid extremely well for it is the prime focus of Walker International Consulting. We offer the 30 Day Challenge and Life Coaching "Back on Track Program" to help people find and live their purpose.
I believe in nature and therefore I believe in love.
I believed in Buddhism too, but then I read the Buddha's quote "teach then the illusion until they are ready for truth" and I realised that the mission of Buddism is to cause peace, not inspire Vision, Inspiration or Purpose - Ie The Future..
Likewise I believed in other religious ideals until I realised that all religious teaching argues with nature's laws and I had to ask myself - "which idea would win in a battle, nature or others?" You know my answer.
I came to realise that we live on a ladder. That in fact all ideals have their place on the ladder. The more desperate we are, (read here stressed and frightened) the lower on the ladder we are, the lower the ideals we need.
So, when I do vision inspiration and purpose with clients, ideals matter. Sometimes people want a bigger and better future but not change their ideals... That can't work can it? Our perceptions of the past are based on our ideals about the past and our perceptions about the past create our future.
It's not really a conflict at all. Our religious ideals are not in conflict with our vision, inspiration and purpose unless they prevent us valuing ourselves or others. If we are stuck, devaluing ourselves because we infatuate our ego mistakenly thinking that it's us, then that is what can determine whether the future is different to the past.
Do you believe you can have love in your life without pain? If so, that's a conflict between your ideals and nature. Do you believe you can be inspired all day every day if so - that's a contradiction between your ideals and nature. Do you believe your vision comes from desires and ambitions? If so, that's a contradiction between your ideals and nature.
Do you believe somebody hurt you more than you hurt yourself, or even hurt you without helping you? If so, that's another contradiction between your ideals and nature.
Do you believe that the universe gives a shit about whether you live on purpose or simply snort cocaine all day - if so, that's another contradiction between your ideals and nature.
Do you think you are not perfect right now and that if you shift something you will become more loveable to your partner, friends, creator? If so, that's another contradiction between your ideals and nature.
Do you believe that by meeting the perfect love of your life - your life will change or that the purpose of a relationship is happiness? If so, that's another contradiction between your ideals and nature.
Doing your Vision, Inspiration and Purpose you don't have to change your religious beliefs... No, not at all. You simply need to align your spiritual beliefs, those beautiful ideals that determine the value of time in your life, the value of love in your life, the value of you in your life, in order to ensure that the foundations that created the past, evolve enough, to create a new future.
If you want a global business - you need a universal perspective... Nature's laws are exactly that.
May your vision be engaging, your inspiration be powerful and your purpose create enthusiasm.
Love nature - love life
Global expert and speaker on work life balance, intuitive guide on VIP (vision, inspiration and purpose) and the originator of distilled application of Nature's Universal Laws.
"I've been trucking along just fine, thinking everything was rosy until a recent event where somebody deceived me, knocked me out of the ball park. I'm not totally ungrounded, depressed and angry at myself. What to do?"
When you feel like you've lost control of your life you get those symptoms - Not because there is a lack of control in reality, but because you think you lost control and those symptoms are how we often use emotion to try to regain it in virtual reality. The fact is your life has always been in and out of control simultaneously. It's just now that the out of control has attacked a core value you didn't recognise. This is nature... try looking for where you are in control instead of exaggerating that you are out of control in the whole of your life. Realistic expectations based on Nature's Universal laws of Life are healthy.
Because most people are disconnected from nature they miss a simple universal law of nature that could save more than 70% of their work time, and help avoid 90% of bad choices.
Sound too good to be true? In nearly all research on human productivity there is a resounding conclusion that most people waste 50-60% of their working time. Here are the most common time wasting elements:
1. Travel - Moving to and from an office in peak hour wastes hundreds of hours a year.
2. Not travelling enough - meeting face to face with investors, partners and stake holders confuses communication.
3. Trust or the lack of it in colleagues means hundreds of hours lost in second guessing and unconscious conversations (rhetoric and dancing around the point)
4. Unclear or undetermined VIP (vision, inspiration and purpose) - This is the worst of the four.
Note that stress does not even rate a mention. Stress is the result of the four not a cause. So, eliminating stress does not fix productivity or save time.