1. Shoulder's Lose
There is a community, a global community bound together by the word should. You should, I should, we should. And this community occupies most of the mental wards of hospitals, ingests most mental meditations and joins radical anti progress associations like save the building down the end of the street. Their fight is against nature and they are going to lose, even if, in the short term their loudest minority voice attracts the press.
2. Shoulder's are rarely happy
Should is a sign of discontent. Usually the one who throws the should at you is sitting on very fragile ground when they do and it's a very unsteady place if it gets challenged. Hence, shoulder's are on the defence because they know they are not on solid defendable turf. They'll come out fighting if you try to change them.
3. Shoulder's beat themselves up allot
In spite of the fact that shoulder's seem to spend a huge amount of time telling you what is wrong with everything they get near, their own mind is not all that functional and can lead to serious bouts of depression, addiction and anger. If a person is shoulding you on the outside you can be sure they're doing it to themselves on the inside. Beware.
4. Shoulder's can't perform alone
A shoulder will recruit others. In my corporate training I say coach em up or out. A shoulder will breed and multiply within a team and often drive the whole team into an unproductive state of them against us. They mean well but rarely do well.
5. Shoulders are exhausting
Add up the time and energy spent by a shoulder and you'll see that 90% of it is spent standing still. They talk big but do little.
You should be doing it this way. They should be doing it different. I should be better off. The Shouder has plenty of fodder for their rhetoric and it's painful. Be aware of how many times your colleague says should and maybe a bit of coaching to get them more open hearted to life could save you and their family an incredible amount of anxiety.
Walker's law: "If you didn't ask for a should,= and wouldn't pay for it, then don't listen to it."
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